16 posts tagged “work”

I've always been more emotional than I would like. I feel intensely. Well, everything in my life tends to be on an intense level so it goes hand in hand. My happy is enough to make me tear up with the beauty and wonder of it all. My sad is like an everflowing fountain. I wish that sometimes I could turn these intensities off, but as I've aged I have realized that in many ways I'm lucky. I am thankful. I care (maybe too much sometimes) I am moved. I am full of love for the people in my life. So if the downside is a lot of extra tears that make me feel exhausted the next day, well so be it.

Things that make me cry:

• various family situations like my brother crying when I leave (then I cry), giving a talk at my in-law's 50th anniversary party about how wonderful they are, my sister when she was dealing with her crappy now-ex husband, etc.
  
• Good good good books. Most recently reading a book of one of my writing colleagues about a child growing up after her unborn sister and her father die within two weeks of her sixth birthday. Oh my I bawled, alone (Joe has been up in VT for work) at midnight all over my Kindle.
• Dr. Who episodes have made me cry lately. Poor lonely doctor! All the women in his life have to leave him!
• Other shows make me cry. Battlestar Galactica. Sex in the City. Anything with sappy wrenching relationship issues make me bawl like a baby. Love stories. Unrequited love. Lost love.  Hell, the movie Titanic flattened me...not because it was particularly good but because of the wrenching, the losing, the depth of connection ripped away. The English Patient--god I can barely watch it it just wrecks me so much.
  
• Feeling inadequate or unwanted/needed makes me cry. This may happen more often than people who know me might guess. Stupid, but true.
  
• Phone conversations with old friends, reminiscing about various events. Sometimes I feel so moved that I know
  

  Sweet lover kitty
  people, such incredible, wonderful people, that I'm moved to tears. 
• the fact that if I only pay the minimum (which is a crapload of $$ let me tell you) on my student loans, I won't be finished until I am 65. Kid you not. And I owe FAR LESS than most students graduating today.
• Sometimes watching moving sporting events or award ceremonies...speeches at the Academy Awards, etc. I can't help but feeling intensely when I see other people feeling intensely.
  
• Thinking about how my Romeo is getting old. He's 14 in October. I know that cats can live to 18-20 now but he's starting to behave differently. Nothing dramatic, just more old cat, like how he doesn't run for his cat treats as quickly or energetically as he used to. He's my closest, dearest friend who has been with me for pretty much my entire adult life. I can't bear the thought of being without him. If I even think about it, like now, I start bawling like a baby.
  
• My jobs have made me cry. In better ways now than in my youth (god, I've had some horrific bosses who have made me cry) but for me it all boils down to the connections I have with people. I want to excel. I want to succeed. Mostly now that is the case, but when I fail it does hit me hard. But more often than not, it's when people I have become connected to leave my immediate sphere. Or when I am the one that leaves. When I left my last job, which was, truly, one of the best jobs with one of the best bosses (who also recently left the company) that I have ever had, I shed many tears. I did some cool things with that company but more importantly, I did them because I had the chance to work with wonderful people who helped me and gave me opportunities in which to best help them.

Gah, that's enough for now. How much crying do you think I should do??

Funny video where they talk about what my company's name, CA (formerly Computer Associates) means...

Okay, so this is going to be another one of my rambly update posts seeing as I'm not the best blogger lately...

 

• 37 on 5th
  
• Kindle coming in my near future.
  
• The price of gas, keeps on rising...nothing comes for free. ♫
  
• Recently I was walking by some developers in my office and overheard them talking about "the Lords of Cobol" and was surprised to see such old guys talking about Battlestar Galactica...until they kept talking and I realized that he was meaning whoever is writing COBOL on the project they are on. I don't think the slip was intentional. It was then that I realized I am rather a bit of a geek. A geek because I assumed it was a BSG reference and a geek because I know what COBOL is.
  
• Oh my Season 3 of BSG is turning out to be amazing, IMHO. I'm so so so addicted. And frustrated that they are going to drag it out into 2009.
  
• Is anyone using Friendfeed?
  
• Yet another blog is in my future, putting the total at three. This blog. My writing blog (on which I have not been writing, sigh). And soon to be...a professional blog about B2B digital media relations. Gah.
  
• New job is good. Different. Still figuring things out in many ways. I relied a lot on the PR agencies at my previous jobs to handle pitching and getting the news out (imagine that)...this time around I'm realizing that I'm going to really have to get my hands dirty and do more direct outreach myself. I'm used to pulling teeth to get what I need, but this is more like yanking out the whole jaw. On the other hand I seem to be one of the only ones who really get the power of social media, so that's a good thing for visibility. Goes back to how women are the queens of it all.
  
• I've been thinking a lot about trauma, tornadoes (unrelated but tragic in a similar way and I keep dreaming about them) and the preciousness of life. Someone I know recently lost a dear friend and the tragic story has hit home for me in the sense of the ongoing importance to never take the people in your life for granted.
  
• I'm in love with Erin Tyner's photography. Recently bought (note the tornado):

• Listening to:
  

not sure which forces are aligning but my sister and I are ending our jobs at the same time. In both cases we have been a valuable part of the company and both companies really really didn't want to see us go. Her company (she manages cosmetics for a major retail department store in the southwest) was pretty much BEGGING her to stay. No extra compensation offered, just a plate of good, old fashioned guilt. Which made her waver a little, but in the end today is her last day.

And tomorrow is mine. I'm most excited to not have to use Lotus Notes anymore. Hate hate hate that product. Not looking forward to leaving behind colleagues who have become friends, especially my former manager, while I know I'll remain close to her, it just won't be the same not being able to pop down to her office on a whim and rant or rave about any given thing.

The worst thing about my sister quitting though is that my supply of free cosmetics and perfumes (Lancome, Dior, Givenchy, etc) will come to an end. And well, I can't justify spending $60 on face cream or $40 on mascara, so I guess it's back to CVS for me, sigh. Still, it was very very good while it lasted. :)

Sooo I just scored a new job as a PR Director for a big tech firm, helping grow the PR program for one of their newer divisions. It will be a good challenge for me and I'm really excited.

The tough part is telling people at my current job that I'm leaving. My timing is bad, so that doesn't help as we're hiring a new PR firm and we're going to be doing a lot of transition related to that change, much less having to transition my own work. Some people are worried about the hole I'm leaving and I can sense frustration when I mention I'm going. Many understand my reasons. Others are outright joyful that I'll be doing something good for me. But for the most part people have been sad, as I have felt--sad that I won't be working with such great people anymore.

But it's spring now and the peepers are out--I heard them yesterday. What a wonderful sound!

 

The crabapple and cherry trees will bloom in a few weeks and the grass is starting to pop up through the dirt. The temperature will be 70 today! Everything is poised to start bursting and blooming, to follow along the cyclical change and flux of the seasons.

It's a good time to change things up. Fall and spring always seem to represent new transitions for me. New job, new creative infusion, new possibilities.

except that I'm going without Joe which really sucks. And it's not for fun, which also sucks.

But I do get to eat at Red Square & Fleur de Lys in Mandalay Bay. And Daniel Boulud Brasserie in the Wynn (be forwarned, it takes forever to load and is not up front about giving you information until it talks at you).

And I do get to see coworkers that are far away from me (most of the people I work with are in Canada, Atlanta, Boise and California) that I will enjoy seeing.

I suppose there may be a little bit of blackjack and champagne.

And there will be little sleep because when you work shows in Vegas, you are "on" all the time, regardless of where you are, schmoozing, making sure you are saying and doing the right thing.

Hoping I can get some writing in on the plane, but we'll see. I always take a ton of stuff intending to write but then I never do. This time I pared back to just my moleskine and some printouts of my chronological timeline. Would be just my luck to be on a writing streak and bemoaning that I didn't bring more background material with me...

I may or may not post from Vegas, but you'll hear from me soon!

* I toasted the winners of an award ceremony at a black-tie event

* I talked with people from Russia, and the Netherlands.
* As we were driving by, I heard from a cabdriver about his experience when the plane hit the Pentagon during 9/11.
* I helped create video for innovative technology stories that revolutionized and directly benefited society in healthcare, retail, government, education and finance.
* I talked to a big game hunter about his upcoming trip to the Arctic to hunt caribou.
* I discovered that when you really need someone who knows how to tie a bow-tie that no one around has any clue.
* I scored cheap, dressy shoes at Macy's to solve a fashion emergency.
* I drank way too much wine on a weeknight.
* I had to deal with two blisters.
* I discovered that the pants I planned to wear this morning were too big.
* People that should have didn't wish me happy birthday. And people that didn't have to did (THANK YOU!).
* I ate bacon twice.
* I drank champagne.
* I had my picture taken at least a dozen times.
* I spent a few hours here at a lovely formal dinner.
* Spent an hour on a plane that wasn't in the air.
* Was late boarding that plane because some Army Sargeant had special boarding because he was escorting some sort of cargo. Hmm.
* Paris Hilton spent her first night in jail.
* Snagged a cake at Finale at the last moment.
* Slept for a total of 6 hours including the nap.
* I learned some of the secrets to green screen.
* I rode in two limos, a shuttle bus and two cabs.
* My husband made me a cake...or well, drew me one.
* I finalized one press release.
* I wore a pretty dress.
* I hugged a lot of people.
* I gave out all my business cards.
* I ate a lot of beets.
* I inadvertantly found out that I might have a new boss soon  :(
* Kitty and I were angry with each other. He was angry because I left him. I was angry because he didn't greet me when I came back. We're so dumb.
* I chipped a nail.
* I learned that when you toast in Russian you say, "Budem zdorovy" meaning, "To stay Healthy."
* I received a bottle of wine direct from the Cote du Rhone.
* I started year 36 in the life of Crystal.

Here's the next project 365 installment:

Downtown Boston

The view as I drive into work every day...

The little acupuncture statue with all the points in my acupuncturist's office:

The emergency water wheel in the fire escape stairwell at work...

Here's the Project 365 round up for the week.

Day 13:  This is the view from my cube. Sigh. Our office actually has windows all the way around every floor so it does have a lot of light. I just happened to end up on the wall with the main support section which means I get less window. I suppose that's okay. It means I have to get up and walk around to check out any turkeys that appear in the parking lot.